“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all – in which case, you fail by default.” – J.K. Rowling
At the end of the day, failure is part of the process. You didn’t get that job today, and maybe in two weeks time you receive a better offer; you get lost while driving home and end up in a beautiful area you didn’t know; you burnt your toast and well, no there is nothing good coming from a burnt toast. But the point is, how many times we didn’t make that call because we thought we weren’t ____ enough? When was the last time you said “f*ck it, I am doing it”, without listing pros, cons, checked the weather and the alignment of the planets? How easier would it be if we could just follow our gut, do what it feels right for us in that specific moment, and just accept when things don’t go as planned? The thing is, I believe that most of us take any bump on the road as a personal failure: “I didn’t get the promotion because I am not good enough at my job” – what if you didn’t get that promotion for budgeting issues? Or administrative delays? Or maybe, you are really not quite there yet to get the promotion, and so what? Does it make you a less valuable person compared to yesterday? Are you then by default a bad parent, an unreliable friend? No, you are still exactly the same person, maybe more grumpy, but still the same, with the same qualities and faults.
I don’t know how many times I didn’t send that email, or raised my hand, just because I didn’t want to look stupid, or I was afraid of rejection; as it turns out, even if you ask a silly question or you get a “we’ll consider your CV for future positions” email, tomorrow the sun is going to rise*, the flowers blossom and coffee still smell amazing.
*disclaimer: If you live in the UK like me, this is not necessarily true.
And you never know, maybe that question you thought was making you look stupid, actually helped somebody in the same situation as you; or that email that you sent with your eyes shut while praying for the best, turns into a lifetime opportunity – or maybe not, it is becomes only another piece in that jigsaw that is life, but you know what? It is still ok, because all those unique little pieces, no matter how boring or not-so-exciting, can still play their little role to “build” your persona, in its own unique, imperfect, talented, authenticity.